Short funny dirty sayings

Indeed, the shorter it is.”. – Viggo Mortensen. “Life is too short to be reading quotes about life being too short. Stop reading and go live your life!” –Kevin Ngo. “If at first you don’t succeed, quit. When life gives you lemons, quit. When the going gets tough, the tough just quit.”. – Jim Rome..

At 70, you’re like a classic novel. You may be a little long, but you’re still worth the read. Happy 70th birthday! May your day be filled with all the things you love, like good friends, good laughs, and not having to do any housework. You’re 70 today, but don’t worry, you’re still young enough to dream big. There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full. ― Henry Kissinger. He has a face like a Saint ― A Saint Bernard. ― Unknown. A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory. ― Mark Twain. Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work. Valentine’s Day is a time to express love and affection to our significant others. While some may opt for heartfelt and romantic gestures, others prefer to lighten the mood with hu...

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Some funny ideas for table topics are “the art critic,” “the irrelevant word game” and “unusual places.” Each of these short, topic-related games helps break the ice between strang...Mar 5, 2021 ... 20+ Dirty Tongue-In-Cheek Puns That Are Deliciously Inappropriate · Yes, I have my period, and no, I'm not ovary acting. · Having sex in elevators...Funniest Short Poems. 1 Now We Are Six by A.A. Milne. 2 Skin Stealer by Shel Silverstein. 3 My Shadow by Robert Louis Stevenson. 4 The People Upstairs by Ogden Nash. 5 Eletelephony by Laura Elizabeth Richards. 6 If I Were King by A.A. Milne. 7 On the Ning Nang Nong by Spike Milligan. 8 Messy Room by Shel Silverstein.

49 Best Funny Naughty Quotes. “I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box… I don’t even know where the box is.” – Unknown. “A bargain is something you don’t need at a price you can’t resist.” – Franklin Jones. “I don’t have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.” – Unknown.2. "I was hers. She was mine. My body was her chariot, and she drove it into the sun. Her body was my river, and I became the sea." (Gregory David Roberts, Shantaram) —suggested by erenah. 3 ...Happy 80th birthday! #47 “You can live to be a hundred if you give up all things that make you want to live to be a hundred.”. Woody Allen. #48 Usually, we wish for people’s dreams to come true, but maybe it’s better just to simply wish that you are able to fall asleep easily and have some peaceful dreams.Colorful Southern Expressions About Liars. Don't piss on my leg and tell me it's rainin'! Don't pee down my back and tell me it's raining. That dog won't hunt. You're lyin' like a no-legged dog! If his lips's movin', he's lyin'. You’d call an alligator a lizard. That man is talking with his tongue out of his shoe.

Funny Quotes. 1. “I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with ’em later." —Mitch Hedberg. 2. “Gentlemen, you can't fight in here. This ...22. Laundry-all fun and games until it has to be put away. 23. Laundry – take it one load at a time. Laundry Room Sign Sayings. 24. “I love doing laundry! Except for putting it in the dryer, taking it out and folding it and then putting it away.” 25. Everybody wants to save the earth; no one wants to help mom do the laundry. 26.Christmas is a time of joy, love, and togetherness. It’s a time when families come together to celebrate the birth of Jesus and enjoy a delicious feast. One tradition that can add ... ….

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I want to take you out to dinner, then light the bedroom with candles and show you how much I love you. Roses are red. Violets are fine. You be the six. I’ll be the nine. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back. I love every part of you. You’re so beautiful that you made me forget my pick-up line.One Liners and Short Jokes · Puns · Pick Up Lines ... 74 Apple Jokes, Puns and One Liners! 50 Funny Quotes About Taxes ... 43 Old and Funny Dirty Limericks!Birthdays are typically a time of joy, which makes funny birthday messages pretty much a no-brainer. Sure, you could go for something sentimental, but whether you're looking for the right words to personalize a DIY birthday card, make a great toast, or just put together the perfect social media post in honor of the occasion, short birthday wishes that bring on the grins and giggles are always ...

Combine the power of music and humor with these funny and dirty captions featuring lyrics. Get ready to sing along and make your followers laugh. Dirty mind, dirty life. Baby, it's in my genes. Copy Caption. Rockin' the dirty captions like nobody's business.This list contains 30+ dirty, funny, and best Rizz lines, pick-up lines, quotes, and phrases to use for girls, guys, or your crush.

josh bowmar 45+ Funny Things to Write in a Thank-You Card. When you can't find the words to write in a thank-you card, try a little humour. Here are 45+ ideas to get you started. Feel free to use these words and phrases as inspiration for your own card.Lasting only a few seconds, echoic memory is the short-term recall of sounds we hear everyday. It can be a door bell ringing, dog barking, or clicking of a pen. The ultra-short-ter... zion market irvinemichael tirrell james Some examples of ribald Irish toasts include: “May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you’re dead!”. “Here’s to a long life, a merry one, a quick death, and an honest one.”. “May the winds of fortune sail you, may you sail a gentle sea. May it always be the other guy who says, ‘This drink’s on me.'”. pacman pics Dec 29, 2021 - Explore Sarah Smart's board "Dirty Quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about quotes, dirty quotes, funny quotes. Dec 29, 2021 - Explore Sarah Smart's board "Dirty Quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about quotes, dirty quotes, funny quotes. maya tequila ranchrestore alexandriaberkeley waitlist 30th birthday svg-29+1 svg-funny 30th bday shirt-dirty thirty shirt-birthday tshirt-funny womens bday-30th bday png-birthday tshirt-card-dxf. (1.4k) $2.00. Digital Download. PAT McCROTCH Irish Pub Funny SVG. St Patrick's Day SVG, Dirty Adult St Patrick's Day svg, shamrock svg. (599) livermore sanitation They say if you enjoy your job you’ll never work a day in your life. So, God it must have been a tough 50 years for you. (Change the amount of years as applicable. I’m not psychic). Relax, put your feet up and do as little as you can get away with. So just like being at work then. Happy retirement.Get straight to the point with these short funny Christmas wishes. Merry Christmas, that’s all. Make sure you are paying attention to Elf and safety this Christmas. Pass the Prosecc-Ho Ho-Ho. Merry Christmas, there’s snow-one quite like you. It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas. Merry Christmas you old drunk. northwestern ed2tyson vienna gawalker hayes wife Short and sweet friendship quotes. “Some people go to priests, others to poetry. I go to my friends.” —Virginia Woolf. “Wherever we are, it is our friends that …